I receive many emails and letters every week asking for my advice on parenting issues. Well, this week, I'm asking readers to give me advice on my current parenting dilemma -- kids sleeping in our bed!
Here's the lowdown: as many of you know, I have five kids. The youngest, Paloma, is five months old and sleeps in a co-sleeper next to my side of the bed. She still gets up five times a night to nurse and/or use my breast as a pacifier. Upon hearing this, a good friend recommended I buy a pacifier. Though I never used one with my other kids, I bought one and Paloma likes it and uses it. Unfortunately, she often loses it during the night which results in her waking up and my having to wake up to find it or nurse her back to sleep. My two year-old, John-Paul, sleeps most of the night in a crib in his room. However, he wakes up every morning at 4:30 am screaming at the top of his lungs to be taken out of his crib. He's stubborn and loud so we end up getting up and bringing him to our bed because we don't want his screams to wake up the baby. Our four year-old, Lucia, and six year-old, Jack, will also come into our bed, though the days and times vary. There are mornings when we wake up to all three kids in the bed. Recently, we purchased bunk beds and instead of storing the old toddler bed in the basement, we put it in our room in hopes that at least one of them would sleep in it. Occasionally, Lucia will, but inevitably, she ends up in our bed before the night is over.
Having kids in the bed disrupts our sleep and God knows that parents with five kids need their sleep. On the other hand, we know that this stage is limited (our nine year-old no longer comes to our bed at night ) and that we will one day pine for the days when our kids loved to crawl in our bed and cuddle. What should we do?
The Kansas City Academy offers kids in grades 6-12 foods like pizza with whole wheat crust, hormone-free cheese and organic toppings. What salad with that? Help yourself to greens and veggies grown in a nearby organic, pesticide-free garden.
The school is one of three in the Kansas City area participating in Bistro Kids' Farm 2 School program, which replaces your basic, high-fat cafeteria fare like cheeseburgers and chicken nuggets with natural, locally grown food, such as free-range meats.
Whats that? You're vegetarian, you say? Vegan, even? No worries, just ask the chef to prepare you a special, fresh meal that meets your dietary requirements.
Bistro Kids' owner, Kiersten Firquain, believes kids' dietary habits contribute to poor physical and mental health, and she isn't alone in that belief. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the number of overweight kids has increased drastically in the past 20 years, which in turn has increased the number of kids with diabetes.
Schools have responded by trying to offer fresh-food alternatives, but are often stymied by cost. Those with high poverty rates suffer the most -- the federal government reimburses schools about $2.57 per free meal served, but most districts say an average meal costs $2.88.
Students who participate in free-lunch programs are often the ones most in need of a nutritional boost. I, for one, would be more than willing to put a few more bucks in my school-tax bill to help children in my neighborhood eat a healthier diet. How about you?
A six-year-old girl in Bristow, Virginia is being hailed as 'amazing' for fighting off an intruder who jumped into the backseat of her mother's car while it was parked in the family's garage. The girl was strapped into the car alone while her mother dropped a note in a mailbox a few doors down. In the blink of an eye, a man ran into the garage, lowered the door and got into the back seat of the car with the little girl.
According to Sgt. Kim Chinn, the girl gets an A+ for remembering her stranger danger lesson. "The 6-year-old fought him," Sgt. Chinn said. "She screamed, she kicked, and she pinched him. And I just think that was amazing for a 6-year-old to think to do that. Screaming was fantastic; the other stuff, even better."
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The girl's screams alerted her mother, who ran back into the garage in time to see the intruder flee the scene. News reports are referring to this guy as a would-be burglar, but I question why he got in the backseat with the girl if all he intended to do was steal. What was he after? Her lunch box?
Talking to your kids about what to do should a stranger approach can be a scary thing. Scary for you because the idea that someone would want to harm your child is at the top of the list of Very Bad Things that could happen in life. Scary for your child because it makes the world seem like a big, unfriendly place where horrible strangers are out to get them. Unfortunately, sometimes the world is a big, unfriendly place. But this story proves that those stranger danger lessons are important and that being small doesn't have to mean being powerless.
Is it time to carve the pumpkin yet? Depends on where you live. Having spent most of my life in a warm climate, I've learned that no matter how anxious the kids are to slice into that pumpkin, sometimes it is best to wait. If you cut too early, there is a good chance that the pumpkin you carve today will be a moldy pile of mush next week.
But even if you've already got some frost on your pumpkin, a knife-free jack-o-lantern might be the way to go. There are lots of kid-safe ways to dress up that orange gourd of October that are guaranteed not to involve a trip to the emergency room for stitches.
The easiest and fastest way to turn a pumpkin into an objet d'art is to paint it. For the best results, lightly sand the pumpkin first so the paint will adhere without flaking. Then set your kids loose with a brush and some acrylic paints to create a scary face, black bats or even pretty flowers. When complete, a top coat of clear sealer will ensure that the masterpiece lasts until Halloween and beyond.
Get out the glue for another knife-free alternative to prettying up a pumpkin. Buttons, leaves, felt cut-outs and even glitter can turn an ordinary pumpkin into an extraordinary pumpkin.
For kids who are a little bit older, try sequins and straight pins. Sketch out a design first and then bring it to life with sparkly sequins held in place with the pins. This takes patience, but in the end you will have the most glamorous pumpkin on the block.
Those are just a few ideas for safely turning a pumpkin into a unique work of art. How do you dress up a pumpkin without a knife?
This week there was frost on the ground and the sky was strewn with wind-tattered clouds, V's of honking geese, and the last wayward monarchs heading toward
. At recess the kids would pause for a second, mid soccer game, to look up at the sky and yell LOOK! LOOK! Their faces full of wonder and glee.
It was the kind of weather that called us outdoors every day for an extra mid-morning recess.
Even though I'm theoretically sacrificing academic time by heading outdoors for a handful of minutes with my class, I find I mostly gain time because the children are less restless and more willing to settle down with a good chapter book or a math activity when their bodies have had some time to run outdoors. But I also like going outdoors with them because it gives me a chance to watch them interacting together in an unstructured way.
I keep noticing how uncertain they are in their play together without an adult intervening for them whenever something doesn't go their way.
I know. I've probably exhausted you with my posts about play and children, but it's my obsession. I can't let it go.
Those classic cartoons we loved as children may have been violent, but they could have been much worse. When Bugs Bunny gets shoved off a cliff, he doesn't splatter into bloody pieces. He just gets up and walks away from the bunny-shaped indentation he left on the ground. When Tweety ends up in Sylvester's mouth, he doesn't crunch up into bird bits. He gets spat out whole.
Looney Tunes cartoons are violent, but they never show the reality of the consequences of the violence. At least they don't on television. Those consequences are displayed in all their bloody glory in a new art exhibit by James Cauty called "Splatter". On display at London's Aquarium Gallery, the show features the famous Looney Tunes characters like you've never seen them before. There is a blood-soaked Daffy Duck minus his head, which has been blown off by a gun-toting Bugs Bunny. There's Jerry, having finally been caught by Tom, hacked into small, bloody pieces. And Tweety is nowhere to be seen, but Sylvester's blood-covered mouth gives you a good idea where he went.
The exhibit is described as 'unrelenting acts of blood and discomfort never previously witnessed on the Cartoon Network' and is intended to shock. "Its very difficult to shock kids these days - you have cartoon characters being shot in the head and walking off cliffs, so we have decided to replace them with something more realistic," says the 51-year-old artist.
Despite the 'Parental Advisory Content' warning on the exhibit, kids are enjoying the show. "It's amazing work, and from the reactions we've had to it so far, children have loved it," says gallery owner Steve Lowe. "It should be a very successful show, and will raise lots of questions about violence in the media and in our culture."
Do the kids like it just because they recognize the characters? Or have children really become so desensitized to violence that it no longer shocks them?
Is there any greater childhood pleasure than sorting through an enormous bucket of candy on a cool October evening? Rummaging past the Bit-O-Honey, pennies and black licorice bits, you come across the Holy Grail of all Halloween treats -- a full-sized Reese's Peanut Butter Cup.
All candies are not, after all, created equal. As with all things in life, there is a hierarchy of Halloween sweets. Perpetual favorites are full-sized chocolate bars of all kinds, but Almond Joy and peanut butter cups come out on top. Snickers bars are a crowd-pleaser, as are Dum Dum Pops and Charms Blow Pops.
The Kit Kat wafer bar has its place, as do sour candies of the Nerds variety. Gummy candies of any kind always find their way into small tummies, and you won't find any Nestle Crunch or Mr. Goodbar hanging out in the candy bowl. You also won't go wrong handing out Milky Way bars or Baby Ruth.
Chocolate is, of course, king, but no one will turn their nose up at the right hard candy. Jolly Ranchers continue to be popular with the ghouls and goblins, as are Life Savers.
The all-time favorite Halloween candy? Why, candy corn, of course. Who can resist that chewy, sweet, high-fructose corn syrup treat?
My first stop on the Halloween trail was the dentist's house -- he always gave out full-size Hershey's chocolate bars. What did you eat first, and what went stale in a bowl on top of the refrigerator?
When I bought both of my daughter's car seats, I did so with the idea in mind that eventually, they would use them as boosters. Silly me. Both came with good safety ratings, sure, but earlier this month, both appeared on the "not recommended" list of the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety's review of booster seats.
The group recently tested 41belt-positioning booster seats. Thirteen (my two included) did a poor job of improving fit at the lap and shoulder, increasing the chance of injury in a car accident. The IIHS shows parents how a belt should fit here, and also gives an example of a poorly fitting belt. The idea is that the lap belt should fit flat against the top of the thighs, not across the soft abdomen.
The IIHS is calling for the 13 seats that didn't past the test to be redesigned. The good news is that the best booster seats are not the most expensive. In fact, my mom just bought a Graco Turbobooster (the backless model is a recommended seat) for about $19 for her own car. If you, like me, are in the market for a new booster seat, visit the IIHS's website to see their best bets and good bets, as well as those seats that are not recommended.
The United States isn't the only country with a problem of childhood obesity, it seems. Apparently, South Korea is battling the problem as well. In fact, the situation is bad enough that the government there is planning to do something about it -- they're going to pay for gym memberships and other weight loss activities.
A changing diet and more sedentary lifestyle has led to a tripling of obesity, according to health ministry official Chun Myung-sook. Kids will get as much as thirty dollars a month to help reduce their weight. "Kids won't be able to waste the money on eating sweets. We will give them electronic vouchers that can only be used in designated places," Chun said.
In 2006, the government spent two trillion dollars on childhood obesity-related costs; spending a bit to reduce that and help kids live healthier lives makes sense.
I doubt any parent thinks of a product called "Sugar Smacks" as nutritious. We reserve that kind of labeling for cereals that have no taste or taste like compacted sawdust. Still, would it surprise you to find out that many cereals, especially those designed for kids, are essentially candy? Move over Butterfinger, moms and dads could be handing out samples of cereal to the sweet seeking trick-or-treaters hitting their doorsteps this October!
Sugar Smacks were renamed Honey Smacks some time well after I stopped eating cereals (and being a kid--I guess those two things are linked) but a consumer group still found they were half sugar by weight. So, too did they find as such for Golden Crisp. Never heard of that one. If you'd told me that Cocoa Puffs were half sugar I would believe you, but the consumer group didn't test those.
As you might expect, Cheerios (champion cereal of small children everywhere) and Honey Nut Cheerios were found to be the healthiest. Cheerios ranked first with only one gram of sugar and three grams of fiber per serving. The study of cereals also found that kids serve themselves at least twice as much per serving as recommended. Who doesn't--especially if it's delicious and full of sugar??? Kellogg, who make Honey Smacks, noted they've made strides to increase the nutritional content of several cereals, including Fruit Loops, and that a serving of yogurt contains more sugar than a serving of Honey Smacks. What they didn't point out is the size of a serving of each--I'd wager you get a lot more yogurt than you do cereal per recommended serving. It also depends on what kind of yogurt you're discussing, as some brands add sugar a lot more liberally than others.
Show and tell at school is great. Kids love it because it is a chance for them to bring something personal from home and show it off to all their classmates. Choosing just what to bring for show and tell can be difficult, but favorite toys and vacation souvenirs are always good ideas. But if you are looking for bad ideas of what to bring for show and tell, look no further than this mom in Stevensville, Montana. She brought a dead bat to her kid's elementary school. And if that wasn't bad enough, that bat was dead because it had rabies.
Now, I don't know if it was really show and tell day for her two kids at Stevensville Elementary, but she did more than show and tell about it anyway. She allowed the students in one kindergarten class and four fifth grade classes to actually handle the dead creature.
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According to Superintendent Kent Kultgen, her bad idea was well thought out. She presented the bat along with "good information" and even brought hand sanitizer for the kids to use after touching it. Maybe she thought this would be a really cool Halloween-related presentation, but clearly it was not. Although the risk of contracting rabies from touching the bat is fairly small, the school is taking no chances. About 90 kids are now receiving rabies shots just in case they came in contact with the bat's saliva.
Those shots could end up costing over $70,000, which will be paid for by the school's liability insurance. As bad as that is, the worst pain will be felt by the students themselves. Over the next few weeks, they will undergo a series of six shots to ensure that they are not infected with a potentially fatal neurological virus. Way to go, mom.
I've heard of towns where, for religious reasons, official Halloween activities are moved up a day if the big day happens to fall on a Sunday. But a town in Massachusetts is pushing trick-or-treating back a day because this year, it falls on a Friday. Now, to me, Halloween on a Friday is about as good as it gets. Because it is a school day, I won't have to listen to "is it time to go yet?" all day long and because the next day isn't a school day, I don't have to worry about bringing my kid down from her sugar high by her 8:30 bedtime.
So, just what do city officials in Oxford, Massachusetts have against Halloween on a Friday? According to Jennie Caissie, chairwoman of the town's Board of Selectmen, the move was prompted by safety concerns. She says that allowing trick-or-treating to occur on a Friday evening would put kids on the streets during "prime time traffic."
I suppose that is a valid concern, but some people think this rescheduling of Halloween is more trick than treat. "Halloween is for the kids and it should be celebrated on Oct. 31. Don't mess with our kids and their holiday," says resident Lorri Shadis.
Police Chief Michael Boss agrees with the decision to move Halloween. "It's safer for kids on Saturday than on Friday. It's only 24 hours. I think if parents address the situation correctly, the kids will be fine. They don't care, as long as they get their candy. Kids don't have to check their calendars to see which night they are free. Besides, their candy will last one day longer."
Disappointing children is one thing, but there is another obvious flaw in this plan. All the towns around Oxford will be celebrating Halloween of Friday as per usual. I suspect there will be lots of kids who talk their parents into driving over to Oxford on Saturday in order to replenish their candy stash. The streets may be safer on a Saturday night, but chances are they are going to be a lot more crowded.
Would you hand your preschooler a bag full of live ammunition?
Now you know how parents of kids with food allergies feel about Halloween. The treats so many children look forward to with glee can be deadly for those who suffer from reactions to peanuts, tree nuts and dairy. But who wants to tell their child that trick or treating is forbidden?
First and foremost, remember that your normal food-allergy rules still apply: read the label of every piece of candy your child collects before they eat it, make sure he or she carries their medication with them while trick-or-treating, and check that he adult in charge knows how to administer the medication if the need arises. Also, give your child a small packet of hand wipes, so they can clean their hands if they accidentally come in contact with an allergen.
These simple rules don't mean your child can't have fun. Rather than trying to read the fine print on candy labels with your flashlight, bring a small bag of "safe" candy from home, so your little trickster can snack along the way. You can also invent new Halloween traditions, such as a "Halloween fairy" who brings safe treats or non-food presents.
Afraid your little one will get into the stash you plan to hand out? Don't give out candy -- try stickers or pencils. Or skip the door-to-door candy collecting altogether, and attend a local event that doesn't focus on food. Local zoos or farms often host Halloween parties loaded with activities.
And remember, your child can always say "no, thank you."
Last but not least -- don't panic. Taking care to follow your normal food-safety rules will help everyone enjoy a fun holiday.
Chef-prepared vegan meals? Organic salad bar? Free-range meats?
A six-year-old girl in Bristow, Virginia is being hailed as 'amazing' for 
Is it time to carve the pumpkin yet? Depends on where you live. Having spent most of my life in a warm climate, I've learned that no matter how anxious the kids are to slice into that pumpkin, sometimes it is best to wait. If you cut too early, there is a good chance that the pumpkin you carve today will be a moldy pile of mush next week.
Those classic cartoons we loved as children may have been violent, but they could have been much worse. When Bugs Bunny gets shoved off a cliff, he doesn't splatter into bloody pieces. He just gets up and walks away from the bunny-shaped indentation he left on the ground. When Tweety ends up in Sylvester's mouth, he doesn't crunch up into bird bits. He gets spat out whole. 
Is there any greater childhood pleasure than sorting through an enormous bucket of candy on a cool October evening? Rummaging past the Bit-O-Honey, pennies and black licorice bits, you come across the Holy Grail of all Halloween treats -- a full-sized Reese's Peanut Butter Cup.
When I bought both of my daughter's car seats, I did so with the idea in mind that eventually, they would use them as boosters. Silly me. Both came with good safety ratings, sure, but earlier this month, both appeared on the "not recommended" list of the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety's review of booster seats. 
The United States isn't the only country with a problem of childhood obesity, it seems. Apparently, South Korea is battling the problem as well. In fact, the situation is bad enough that the government there is planning to do something about it -- they're going to 
I've heard of towns where, for religious reasons, official Halloween activities are moved up a day if the big day happens to fall on a Sunday. But a town in Massachusetts is pushing trick-or-treating back a day because this year, it falls on a Friday. Now, to me, Halloween on a Friday is about as good as it gets. Because it is a school day, I won't have to listen to "is it time to go yet?" all day long and because the next day isn't a school day, I don't have to worry about bringing my kid down from her sugar high by her 8:30 bedtime.
Would you hand your preschooler a bag full of live ammunition?
